Woman blown away by boyfriend’s $30,000 financial request: ‘You’re his partner, not an ATM’

A woman doesn’t want to pay for her partner’s daughter’s vacation. 

She went on Reddit’s “Am I the A******? (AITA)” forum to explain her situation. She and her long-time partner are both financially well-off and split most of their finances. But when her partner asked for help paying for his daughter’s vacation, she couldn’t believe the amount of money he asked for. 

“I(43F) have been with my partner(50M) for 6 years now,” she explained. “I have a son (19M) that is currently a high school senior. My partner has a daughter (21F), who is going to college. I am lucky enough to have a very lucrative business and some family money. My partner also makes good money, and the difference in our lifestyles was pretty much negligible.”

“But while I and my late husband made sure to not spoil our son. My current partner and his ex-wife spoil their daughter rotten. Due to an incident when we first moved in together (she demanded my son’s bedroom since it was the second biggest, got rejected since it was his home and she only spends the weekend), and after some family therapy, we agreed that she will be treated like a guest by me. She will have to follow the house rules, and that is the extent of our relationship.”

Now her partner wants her to fit the bill for his daughter’s lavish vacation. 

“The problem is that I did not know the extent to which my partner spent money on her,” she wrote. “Now my son is planning to do a tour of East Asia during the summer, and I was happy to give him the money to do so (as a gift for getting into a very prestigious college). When my stepdaughter heard about it, she asked her dad to pay for a tour of Europe since he didn’t send her on one after she got into college. He agreed because he never says no, but he came to me asking me to lend him close to $30k because he can’t afford the trip on his own. I am not even giving that much to my son and his plane tickets are more expensive.”

“I refused. I said that since this wasn’t an emergency, he can save and send her on the trip after she graduates college. Now he is not talking to me, saying that I am choosing favorites (I have no relationship with his daughter, so I don’t know how that even is applicable) and that I am putting money over his happiness and relationship with his daughter.”

Redditors thought the partner was being ridiculous. 

“Your his partner, not a bank ATM,” a user said

“Your partner is super out of touch,” another wrote

“Your partner is revealing himself to be irresponsible with money,” a person commented

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