Bride sparks controversy with vegan menu at wedding ceremony: ‘Their loss, not yours’

A bride is wondering if she messed up when she didn’t push a family member to attend her wedding

She consulted Reddit’s “Am I the A******” forum for help. The bride was serving only vegan food at her wedding, and when a family member found out, that person decided not to attend. But after the wedding (and the menu) was a smash hit, the family member blamed the bride for not making the ceremony seem enticing enough. 

“In June 2019, my husband and I had our outdoor wedding,” the bride explained. “The issue is I have been vegan for over a decade and I was adamant I would have no animal products at our wedding. One of my husband’s close family members, although he doesn’t like her very much, refused to come because the menu was entirely vegan. Due to her not coming, her husband and other family of her nucleus didn’t come. The day of the wedding was wonderful, the food was fantastic and a lot of his family was amazed at how delicious everything was, much to my immense delight. A great time was had by all, and through the grapevine, my husband heard the family raved about it for months.”

But after the pandemic limited large gatherings, it seemed the family member had a change of heart. 

“This summer we went down to see [my husband’s] family, and the topic of get-togethers came up,” the Reddit poster said. “Cousins started talking about our wedding, reminiscing how everything was so quietly elegant, and then started raving about the food again. Family member who didn’t come became very huffy. Apparently, she hadn’t realized the food was going to be so good or the event so nice and resents that everyone had this great event that she missed. Had I insisted more, and had I emphasized how amazing the food was going to be, she might have come. Every time our or other people’s weddings are mentioned, she makes a face and rolls her eyes a bit at me. Perhaps I really should have pushed more for her presence?” 

Reddit felt the bride did nothing wrong. 

“Their loss, not yours. Their fault, not yours,” someone commented

“She missed out and wants you to be the bad guy rather than accept she was an adult who decided for herself,” another wrote

“She made a choice and now has to deal with the consequences,” a person said

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