Man calls out mom over her ‘manipulative’ holiday dinner plans: ’Your mom sounds like a handful’

A husband is at odds with his family over his wife’s food allergies. 

He consulted Reddit’s “Am I the A******” forum for help. His wife can’t eat gluten or dairy without getting sick. This means that he has to cook holiday dinners at home. When he refused to attend his family’s Canadian Thanksgiving dinner because his wife wouldn’t be able to eat anything, his mother became furious. 

“My wife has an allergy to gluten and dairy,” he said. “So we normally don’t eat out unless we know it’s safe. Time and time again, I have seen my wife fall ill because someone didn’t take the proper precautions after telling us we have nothing to worry about. Fast forward to this year. My dad had a stroke in April. He is ok now, but they took away his driver’s license for the time being. My brother is hosting Thanksgiving at his place. I live in Toronto, he lives in Oshawa. I would invite my parents here, but I know they won’t come. I know my dad would come, but since my mom controls things, he doesn’t want to fight.”

But when he told his mom he wasn’t coming, she accused him of picking sides.

“I told my mom,” he explained. “I will be cooking dinner at my house because of my wife’s allergy, and also we live with her 87-year-old aunt, whom we don’t want to leave alone for too long. She tries to guilt-trip me … telling me, ‘Well, your grandmother will be there.’ I’m like, what do you want me to do? Come there with my wife, who can’t eat any of the food, and have me eat while she doesn’t! That’s not fair to her. My mom basically said that I always choose my wife over her and my side of the family. I’ve mentioned quite a few times that my wife is my wife, and she is my priority and that she will always come first.” 

Reddit users encouraged him to accommodate his wife. 

“Stay with your wife. Your mom sounds manipulative,” a person wrote

“Your mom sounds like a handful,” another said

“You are supposed to put your wife first,” someone commented

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