Woman wonders when she should bring up ‘exclusivity’ with guy she’s dating

A woman was struggling to figure out when to bring up the topic of exclusivity with a new man she was dating, so she asked the internet — and the internet had a lot of opinions.

The woman, 23, turned to Reddit’s “Hinge App” forum to ask for advice. She shared that she isn’t trying to rush into something serious, but she is looking for clarity on the status of her relationship.

Online daters have turned to Reddit to ask questions about everything from breakup advice to why some people add this detail in their dating profiles.

The woman began by sharing that she is dating a 24-year-old man that she met through Hinge.

“Things have been going very well,” she explained. “We have been on 5 dates in the last two weeks.”

However, the woman is new to online dating and unsure of what the etiquette is surrounding dating multiple people.

“Although it’s not something that works for me, I know that it can be quite common to date multiple people at a time, especially when meeting online,” she wrote.

“I was wondering if anyone has any advice on when to bring up exclusivity in the dating process?” she asked, going on to explain that she doesn’t necessarily want to be in a serious, committed relationship yet, but would like to know whether her new beau is seeing other people. 

“I know there won’t be a set rule or anything but a little guidance would be greatly appreciated,” the new online dater concluded.

Redditors weigh in on when to discuss exclusivity

By and large, readers were of the opinion that there are no set rules for when to bring up exclusivity. However, they shared their own tips and advice on the process.

“It’s gonna vary, but what I’ve noticed is that generally when sex comes into play, it’s time to have the talk about exclusivity,” one reader observed.

“If he is spending that much time with you, he either sees you as someone that could be a potential partner, or is playing the long game just to sleep with you. Bringing up this conversation will reveal a lot about his intentions,” another reader advised.

“Everyone is different. Do what you want when you want it,” wrote another Redditor.

When it comes to dating, every relationship is different and, sometimes, the best advice is to just be yourself.

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