A mother is concerned her stepdaughter has too much responsibility.
She shared the situation on Reddit’s “Am I the A******? (AITA)” forum. Her 16-year-old stepdaughter attends boarding school. The issue is the Reddit poster feels her husband and his ex give the teenager too much freedom. Now she is demanding her stepdaughter live closer to family.
“My husband and I have been married for two years and have five children: his daughter from a previous marriage (16), my two sons from a previous relationship (13 and 15), and two children together (3 and 1),” she explained. “My husband’s daughter lived primarily with her mother until she was in 8th grade, when she was offered a scholarship to go to a very good boarding school for high school. I’ve never agreed with the idea of sending teenagers to live away from family, but her mother and my then fiance agreed that it would be beneficial for her.”
“Fast forward to 2022, she’s 16 years old and a junior. I recently learned that her mother moved back to her home country SIX MONTHS AGO and has been letting my stepdaughter manage her own money. This means that there’s now not even a parent in the same state or even side of the country from my stepdaughter. She is completely independent in her day-to-day life.”
The stepmother doesn’t think a teenager should have so much independence.
“My stepdaughter has every weekend unsupervised to do whatever she pleases, and independent access to not only multiple major cities, but is only a day trip from another country that she has dual citizenship in,” she explained. “I’ve seen Facebook posts of her just going to art shows in other states without her having even pretended to ask one of her parents for permission. This isn’t acceptable.”
“It’s not okay for a teenager to just go live her own life, especially to this degree. We have two sons that are only 1 and 3 years behind her, and they’re starting to see the double standard as well. I would NEVER let any of my kids do the things my stepdaughter is doing. She’s my child too, and this needs to stop. She needs to change schools to be either with her mother or with us and be part of a family. My husband says that it’s different because she “was raised differently” and is “just more responsible”, but that’s bull. If he actually thinks she’s not being a normal 16-year-old with that level of freedom, he’s lying to himself.”
Redditors thought the stepmother was out of line.
“She isn’t your kid, so stop trying to force this,” a person wrote.
“You have no good reason for her to change schools and you’re overstepping your role,” another commented.
“Your stepdaughter shouldn’t be made to suffer because you are overly protective of your own sons,” a user said.
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